Not long ago I was struck by a phrase on social media that said "You're not smarter just because you talk tough". As I reflected on this phrase, I found myself reliving a series of situations in which it applied very well and I thought: "actually, this only makes the person more ignorant". Now I'm going to tell you why, using an example that I experienced first-hand in the meeting room of a major businessman.
Many successful entrepreneurs are people who came from humble homes and without much schooling. But they were able to compensate for their lack of academic knowledge with insight, resilience and, most importantly, a dream to conquer. One of the things I've learned on my corporate journey is that life experience is worth more than academic or technical knowledge. And that when you have a dream, a clear goal, determination and willpower, you are closer to success than most people.
I once had the opportunity to take part in a meeting with the owner of a large retail chain. There was me, the account executive and my director, who I'll call Térsio here. While we were waiting in reception, Térsio said: "You can let me lead the meeting. I know how to deal with company owners. I'm used to them and I know their game!". Okay, we said. Those who can command, those who can obey. There was the question of hierarchy - Térsio was our director and would therefore be expected to lead the meeting.
When we entered the office of the company's owner, whom I'll call Sérgio - and whom neither of us knew personally - I was impressed by the luxury. The room was full of space, bigger than my apartment at the time. There was even a grand piano! On the wall, there were photos of various celebrities, including the Pope. Yes, "the Pope", "Your Holiness". They took us to a room with a huge table where we joined five people from the retail company's team.
After 10 minutes, Sérgio arrived for the meeting. He was a nice, small figure, with a bit of a scowl, and very unkempt. He quickly made us feel at ease, demystifying the "Godfather"-style image we'd had until then. I took the initiative to break the ice: "Mr. Sérgio, when my grandmother hears that I've met you, she won't believe it. She always stores at your store". Stressing that he was a lovely person, he said he would "record a video at the end of the meeting sending my grandmother a special hug". When business matters began, Térsio began to present how we could increase the sales of our products in Mr. Sérgio's stores. Everything was going well, until we came to a slide with some market data using acronyms and terms in English, several of them. After the third time Térsio used English, Mr. Sérgio interrupted saying: "My son, I imagine what you're saying is interesting, but can you say something in the language I speak? I can't speak English and I don't know these acronyms. With this request from Seu Sérgio, it was clear that Térsio needed to adjust the way he conducted the meeting so that the arguments and the speech were clearer.
How did the meeting end? After Térsio repeated incomprehensible terms to Seu Sergio, I tried to intervene in a polite way, trying to help convey the most important information we had to present. After a certain point, Mr. Sergio began to pay more attention to me, as if asking me to lead the meeting. In addition to the empathy we had at the beginning, he identified that I was able to convey ideas more objectively, allowing us to establish a dialog and move the negotiation forward. It wasn't easy to control my brain and adjust my speech so as not to repeat all the terms we're used to using in everyday life. Every time a "BTL" slipped out, for example, I automatically explained what it meant so that the idea made sense. In the end, we had a very positive meeting. We closed a "pedidão" and left with the famous "homework".
Let's move on to the conclusion of this text and the relationship with the title: speaking difficult, far-fetched or using complex terms - which in the world of Digital, e-Commerce, Marketing etc., are almost infinite - doesn't make us smarter. It doesn't make us stand out or show how brilliant or intelligent we can be. That's a trap! Knowing your audience, your public and your interlocutors is the most important thing. Understanding the speech and choosing the ideal approach to convey the message correctly. There is nothing worse and more inelegant than a speech that is disconnected and out of step with the profile of our audience. Instead of empathy, we generate rejection and run the risk of conveying an image of haughtiness, even more so in this pandemic in which "meeting rooms" have been replaced by screens. Lack of flexibility and adapting to the audience in order to make information understandable can often be a barrier to some executives advancing in their careers. Not being able to get rid of the "alphabet soup" and thinking that the world has to understand you and not the other way around - "Narcissus, is that you?". The importance of having empathy and adapting easily and sensitively to the audience makes the message clearer, understandable and leaves a positive mark on the recipients.
I'll close with a quote from journalist, reporter and presenter Claudia Belucci: "Communication is not what you say, but what the other person understands from what you've said".
